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Dealing with “Why?”

Some cancer patients become obsessed with the WHYs:  Why do I have cancer?  Why now?  Why me? Why is it in my lung instead of somewhere easier to treat?

If I spent time pondering all the WHYs, I would have less time for LIVING with cancer.

One good thing cancer has done for me is clarifying what’s important. “Important” is spending quality time with family and friends, being kind to and doing something useful for others, appreciating the natural world, learning to be a better person, and taking care of myself as best I can. I am curious by nature, and love to learn the whys of the universe. Yet, in the case of my cancer, the answers would have no beneficial impact on my treatment or what I do with the time I have left.  It’s like being obsessed with a good whodunit novel–nice to know the ending, but who shot JR makes no difference in real life.

I probably will never know exactly when, how or why I developed the type of lung cancer I have, or why it behaves the way it does. And I’m OK with that.

8 thoughts on “Dealing with “Why?”

  1. I agree Janet, that knowing that whys of it all, wouldn’t make any difference. Your blog however, was a good reminder to me to hold each day lovingly in my hand and make sure I enjoy every moment of it. Or, as much as I can. Take care, Diane


  2. Janet, your outlook is healthy for everyone — not just those with cancer. Although it’s probably good to examine what’s going on in one’s life, I’d say, “If I spent time pondering all the WHYs, I would have less time for LIVING.”


  3. Sometimes I think I got cancer to make me appreciate life which I took for granted before dx..and as you said what is really important in life. I no longer sweat the small stuff and try to help others in any way I can enjoy every single day that we have on this beautiful earth. Thanks for sharing your thoughts which we all feel from time to time.


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